To cut or not to cut

My hair is as long as it has been in a REALLY long time. Chris is loving it. Me, well, let's just say that I love it out of my face and in some version of a ponytail or bun or something. I have been trying to get my hair cut for three weeks and for one reason or another it has been rescheduled four times. So, with the sun shining today, I know weather will not be the excuse. However, if my stylist is still sick, then she'll probably cancel on me...again.

So, here's my conundrum. I hate feeling my ponytail wave back and forth when I run so I put it lower and usually into a bun. When my hair is up all the time it breaks the curls and my really fine hair so I end up with lots of frizzies and split ends. However, I have tried short hair and with all these really tight ringlet curls I end up looking more like a drawing of Little Orphan Annie than someone trying to get a bank to buy into my ideas.

I also have to factor in that I will be traveling for work some and in early April I will be in Florida for almost a week. For most women, that's a non-issue. For those of us with super curly hair, the poses a styling challenge. My curls shrink about 2" in length. So I don't know that short is the way to go. I need a little length to accommodate for the shrinkage.

What do you think of these styles? Or email me a picture of something you think I should try!

First Ever 5k--FINISHED!!

Well, what a week that was. After complete work insanity for three days, I ended up in Corpus Christi, TX for work on Thursday afternoon and all day Friday for a client visit with a coworker. Great experience for me, but it made for a really long week.

So, Sunday was the big day. My first ever 5k race. I thought there were thousands that ran the race, but in reality there were 2 events happening in Wash Park which made it seem bigger that it really was. There were 509 finishers for the Valentine's Day 5k, and I was one of them. But before I tell you how I did, I want to tell you how I felt...

I was terrified. I had a few little butterflies as I was picking up my race bib, then I realized I had to pee...only we were a little late and the line was really long. So, I figured I could hold it for an hour or so. Then came the national anthem and it became very real for me. As Lisa and I crossed the start line, I felt a wave of tears and vomit all at the same time. It was like my first ski meet all over again. There were so many people on this narrow path that it took us a good mile to even out. The first mile happened right on schedule, 12 minutes: 30 seconds. A few seconds off pace, but I chalked that up to the log jam at the beginning. And then the sun crested the buildings. My face began to BURN and I realized that I was WAY over dressed for the 60 degree temperatures.

I was wearing my Under Armour cold gear pants, two t-shirts and a jacket. I was able to take the jacket off and tie it around my waist, but the 2 t-shirts had to stay on...my race bib was pinned to both of them. The second mile finally had a water stop. They gave me 2 sips when I really wanted a gallon, but that's OK. It gave us a 90-second walking break to regroup. I felt so much better. But then I had to run another mile plus a little bit.

That third mile...oh, my. I got about half way through and told Lisa that I was going to puke. And this is why she's one of my best friends...she looked at me and said, "ok, fine. You've got 30 seconds to either puke or catch your breath, then we finish strong." I didn't puke. I walked for my 30 seconds and kept going. Even sprinted a little at the end.

I finished in 40 minutes and 7 seconds (Lisa was 40:06). About 3 minutes off pace. But the feeling of accomplishment that came with it was overwhelming. I was hot and sweaty and thought my hands were going to explode because they were so swollen. But I was so proud of what I had just done that I cried all the way home. I mean REALLY cried. I couldn't control it and I really didn't know where the tears were coming from. It was somewhere deep down in a place that I think I bury emotions sometimes.

Yesterday I spent in and out of a weepy emotional state. And it took me most of the day to figure it out (because all those tears really annoyed me). So, in a long winded, share too much, kind of way, here's what I figured out:

I carry some extra weight and have for most of my adult life. There was a time when I reached my goal but that was because I paid out the nose for a personal trainer to work me hard three days a week. As soon as I couldn't afford to do that any more, the weight came back on. I have been plagued by injuries in my knee and my foot, and generally had the attitude of "I am not a runner. I have never been a runner and I will never be a runner." I never really pushed myself to any sort of limit. I am good about getting a good sweat on at the gym, but seriously, the slightest sign of fatigue and I'd slow down or just stop.

From a self esteem perspective, well, I have come a long way, and until I actually had some, I faked it. And honestly, most of it has come since I met Chris. He's good for me. But for the 29 years leading up to that day I had some rough times through school and a practice wedding that only made matters worse. For 29 years, other people believed in me more than I believed in myself. And I have buried that so deep and faked it so well for so long that I actually thought it went away. Well, SURPRISE! Those feelings are still there, and very much alive.

The Jenna that ran the race yesterday was not Jenna today. It was the Jenna from years ago that never thought she could do it. And yesterday I invited her out to play and see how much fun life can really be. The old Jenna didn't believe the new Jenna could really ever do that, although new Jenna was pretty sure she could.

I think that yesterday, FINALLY, I put to rest some of the demons that have been holding me back. And now I can't wait to see what else they've been preventing me from doing. Maybe the old me can hang out with the new me in harmony and happiness. It's nice for all this stuff to finally surface. I want it to keep erupting like this so that I can keep moving forward.

And the best part, I have a long run date with Lisa every Saturday morning at 9:00. On the docket for this Saturday...4-5 miles. And it feels really good.

Another Snow Post

I sold my soul to mother nature in return for a super cute, red, down-filled, Eddie Bauer winter coat. Mother Nature, or in this case, my husband, was nice enough to buy the jacket for me in return for the promise of shoveling for the rest of the season. I had already spent all my spending money until pay day,but I really wanted that coat. And we don't get that much snow, right?!?!

That was at 1:30 Saturday afternoon. Since then, we have received about 18 inches of snow and I have shoveled 3 times.

The guy two doors down has a snow blower. He is also very friendly. He waved and smiled at me this morning as I moved 10 inches of heavy snow off the driveway. I smiled and "waved" back. It's a good think I wear mittens rather than gloves...he may have put the snow back in my driveway.

Braver-Stronger-Smarter

I know we've talked about this before. I was laid off for most of 2009. It was a very difficult time for me personally and I can't even begin to tell you about how much I changed in those 9 months. And all that change was for the better. No regrets.

That Christmas, my Mom gave me the best Christmas gift EVER. The one that I will cherish for the rest of my life. Here's a picture of the wall hanging with the most incredible thing ever on it:

It spoke to Mom when she saw it. It was how she viewed me during that time. Which means she saw in me what I really wanted to see in me.

I look at the picture every day. And every day, it continues to inspire me to be better. To be braver, stronger and smarter.

Two years ago, my father-in-law, Keith, was diagnosed with a form of Lukemia called CLL. Thankfully, Keith continues to fight the disease and has managed to avoid having to go through chemotherapy. He goes to the doctor every other month for more lab work, each time knowing that this may be the time they tell him everything is about to change. That he will have to endure chemo and his hopes of fishing and traveling will have to be put on hold. That bravery and strength will have to take over as he begins the most difficult part of the battle.

In 2010, when Stand Up 2 Cancer became an international phenomenon, Keith knew instantly that it was an organization he believed in. His doctor believes in it and that's where he will donate all his spare dollars to. It is the only organization that gives 100% of funds raised to collaborative cancer research. Most others have tremendous overhead that's paid first.

Over Christmas this year, we were told that this will likely be the year Keith will have to do chemo. I felt an overwhelming need to do something to help. Something to support him. I am not a doctor. I already cook special foods for him. I don't live close enough to transport him around and don't make enough money to hire some help for them. The only thing I knew to do was to support what he believes in. Do my part to help fight his battle. I wanted to give to Keith AND to his chosen organization: Stand Up 2 Cancer.

And to let Keith know that he is not alone in fear and that I know he is as brave as I am, I decided to run a half-marathon. 13.1 miles to show Keith that as a family we are braver than we believe, stronger than we seem and smarter than we think. And that together, we will fight this fight with him.

That's how I formed the Braver-Stronger-Smarter team via Stand Up 2 Cancer to raise funds for the organization. And because I can't ask for money just for the sake of it, I am going to run 13.1 miles to earn it. To be brave. To be strong. And to be smart (that's the fundraiser part, not the running part!).

You will notice the new widget at the side of the blog. It's going to stay there until May 15 when I run the Colfalx Half-Marathon. Every dollar helps.

So, how 'bout it? Will you Stand Up 2 Cancer with me?

Mr. Wizard Failed Me

Well, not really. But he did inspire me to do an experiment this morning. Our temperature is a balmy -12 with a wind chill of -36. That's REALLY cold for Denver. All our schools are closed because of the dangerous temps. I actually noticed that there is a little frost on the INSIDE of our windows. The thermometer in my office is reading 56.6 degrees, prompting the fireplace to burn but it's having trouble keeping up with the draft coming off the windows.

So, what was the experiment, you ask. Well, my math says that -36 is more than double freezing (nice logic, eh?!). So I bundled up, grabbed a glass of boiling water, went outside and tossed it into the air. Guess what happened...You'll never believe it!!!

NOTHING! Nothing happened. I threw boiling hot water all over our deck which I am pretty sure is now a frozen glob of ice right in front of Chris' Weber grill. It was a good idea. I even asked Chris to video tape it, just in case it was awesome. He laughed at me and said that "wind chill is nothing more than how the air feels on skin." And to actually have this work, the temperature had to be -36 with a wind chill of -50 or something. What a party breaker. But who cares! The moral of the story... sometimes you just gotta be a kid.

The best weekends are those spent among friends

Last night we had our friends, Christie and Alan over for dinner. Christie and I grew up together and were friends throughout junior high and high school, although were never that close. She moved to Colorado after our junior year and I didn't see or hear from her until she found out that we had moved to Colorado in 2006. We met for lunch and had dinner once years ago. Then life happened.

After not seeing them for a few years, when Chris and I moved to the south side of Denver in August, we reached out to meet up with them. It turns out they only life about 2 miles from us. So, last night dinner started at 6:30 and ended around midnight. Lots of laughs, lots of food and probably a little too much wine. I twas a wonderful evening. And we are already planning our next evening of shenanigans.

Today I am meeting on of my best friends in Denver for pedicures and lunch. Lisa has 2 boys 2 and 6 months so isn't able to get out of the house with out them very often. We try to meet once a month for some girl time, and today is my lucky day! How great that it is on the heels of such a fun evening. It's like the cherry on top of a completely perfect sundae (or should I say, Sunday?)!

And speaking of cherries...we are meeting at the Cherry Cricket for an AWESOME burger. It's been a Denver establishment for years. And the quality of the bar food is pretty incredible.

So, cheers to a perfect weekend!

Like umm assembly lines are...

Let me start by saying that I have been volunteering for Junior Achievement since sometime in college. That means I have been doing this for more than 15 years. And primarily for second and third grades. I love the little buggers. And I have to admit that I learn something new from every class I teach. Mostly it's about imagination, honesty and love.

Today was the first time I can actually say that I heard the same wrong yet completely right response to a question that I heard a few years ago, and it still cracks me up. So, here's the context:

Today the students learn that "produce" can also mean "to make" and does not only refer to fruits and vegetables. They also learn the value of working as a team and the differences between 2 different production methods: Unit production and an assembly line.

After a quick review of the previous lesson, we jumped in to today's lesson with little introduction. I wanted to get a gauge of the room so my first question was "what does produce mean?" I got the standard, "you know, the healthy stuff at the grocery store" followed by typical "nuh uh, it's only apples and bananas" and the usual "the stuff you put in a salad." Now that that's out of their systems, we talk about making stuff and producing products. They get it. So, it's time to move on.

My next question was "what is an assembly line." This is awesome. EVERY hand in the room went up. I hold to the fact that in 15+ years, these really are some of the smartest 2nd graders I have come across (albeit a bit unruly with their substitute teacher today). And then Haven said the following, "um um like um, assembly lines are um like when we all line up in the um hallway to um go to the gym for um like something special." Best. Answer. EVER! And she's not wrong.

From there the lesson digressed. I lost control of the room. It's 65 degrees and sunny here today. Coupling that with a substitute teacher and a Friday means that you don't have a prayer of getting through to them today . Thankfully it's not until next week that we learn about government, taxes and voting!

So, there you have it. An assembly line is when we all line up in the hallway to go to the gym for something special. Or, it's how we make cars and stuff. You choose.

Happy Friday!